Saturday, September 27

They think I am dangerous



I am learning a new lesson now. I'm not entirely certain what it will end up being, but I guess I'm just hoping that it will be one that won't have to be repeated AGAIN.
The term that I am trying to ingest is "Therapeutic Boundaries". And while I am fairly sure that some of the reasons may have been valid, I am quite positive that the Staff member that had taken it upon herself to be the "Tech Police" is also to be credited, to no small degree, with my newly increased personal time. (Translation: I was fired.)
I'm grateful that I had talked to one of the 2 Therapists of the facility, just moments before being given the information that it was probably best if I didn't continue my learning about this subject at this facility. This way, there is at least one other person there that KNOWS the truth about things. I don't know, maybe my previous hunch about not being cut out for a conventional work environment is right. Maybe I'm not going to be where I'm most helpful until I'm in a position that's not "Corporate".
For one thing, "someone" told the powers that be that I had given a patient my ADDRESS and my EMAIL ADDRESS. Both of these are lies. (Nor had I given anyone my phone number, just so we're all clear on that.)
Ironically, I was talking to the Therapist, thinking that I was going to go into this OFFICE and ask them if there was any kind of "Mentoring" options, which had been suggested to me, b/c I liked this job so much, and it is/WAS so critical that I know what was and was not ok, as far as Pt./Staff boundaries....
Apparently it was wrong for me to talk to a patient who has eating issues, about having had the same issues when I was her age. And this was harmful HOW??? Apparently, there is some way that Staff is supposed to act like they care about the kids when they are on the clock, and then when they leave, just not give it another thought. Apparently, caring for these children involves being a physical, observant, and directional being, but nothing other than that, coz you know they've been hurt and you can't --- WHAT?? I'm not even 100% certian what it is that I did wrong, which leads me back to the (AHEM) Staff member who was embellishing and exaggerating as she REPORTED on my actions. I suppose no one will ever consider the connection between her patient in fact doing SMB (Self Mutilating Behavior) while Ms. Tech Police was watching ME. But I'M the one who no longer is safe to be around the kids.
AND it was wrong for a patient to ask when I would be working again????????!!??

WTF.

So, as if everything else wasn't bogus enough, I was so shocked and sad that I was being thought to be harmful to the children, and probably a little bit angry at the person who was at the bottom of it all, that I sat in that office and BLUBBERED like a damned baby. I was crying like my cat had been killed. And you know THAT bunch was probably taking notes and analysing my warped psyche. Maybe I should ask if I can have a copy of their findings when I go pick up my last check?
I guess there were a lot of things that I was crying about, and many of them I don't even need to acknowledge right now. I would like to get to a place where I don't have to be scared that just b/c I like a job a LOT, that it means that it won't last long.
I know God's in charge, and I know His plan is perfect. He will guide me to the place where I am s'posed to fit, and in the perfect time. I just wish I could sleep for a few months.

I loved that job. I was making a difference. I know that most of the staff liked me. I will do better next time. Now I had better get to work on that resentment.

And the beautiful monkeys above are mine, and I'm ALLOWED to be my dangerous self around them.

4 comments:

  1. I don't know the whole story, but I am taking your side anyway. Sometimes if we are too ambitious, it causes aninmosity among our co-workers. I have had this experience before. Sounds like maybe that is what happened. Like you said, in God's time. You are right where you are supposed to be! Try to enjoy the break!

    ReplyDelete
  2. How terrible. And these places wonder why their "success" rate is so poor. Enjoy your monkeys. Before you spit you'll be back in the game.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am sorry you are going through all this. Like Patty, I do not know the details but I know therapeutic boundaries are very important especially when it pertains to kids. My understanding of self disclosure is a therapist only self discloses if it will benefit/help the client. The disclosure should be brief with very little details since the treatment is suppose to be about them and not us. Somewhere/somehow you will find the job that fits just right. Do not give up nor be too hard on yourself. This too shall pass.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Thank you so much for the encouraging words, Ladies.
    Funny how God works: since that day, the amount of hours the other job has given me has been around 5x what I'd been getting from them, and it's in the town where I live, much less formal of a place (YAY) and I am way happier there. Now I can brush up on all those "details". And Patty, I think you might be right about the animosity, too.
    thanks again my sisters.

    ReplyDelete

Please let me know what your thoughts are. The check's in the mail. ; )

Archives